kinkaid.wars 001It was just two weeks before Christmas when all through the stores,
the signs announced the prices were lower, lower, lower.
Lower than Black Friday
Lower than Cyber Monday, yes…
lower than they had ever been before.
So I jumped in the mini and said, “Oh, what the heck, a Humvee I’ll need so I can load it all before I come back!”
So, while the children were all singing in their school play
hoping American Idol would soon come their way
to judge and to cringe at the sound they were making
then eat all the cookies that the mothers had been baking.
I ran to this store and then that store being on my list
needing to find the best place and not let the best price be missed.
Then out on the highway there arose such a clatter
a TOYS ‘R’ US truck had just rolled over and splattered
Ten tons of toys on the concrete and stone
but before I could get there,
the truck had been picked to the bone.
But the driver was so tiny, so little and quick
that before the police arrived he had called PROGRESSIVE
and Flo pulled up and pulled out all the tricks.
The truck jumped aright as if all on its own
while Flo was clapping and laughing as she talked on her phone.
The truck drove away even though it was empty and bare
while the police in the helicopter just hovered and stared.
One cruiser then two cruisers now three and then four
pulled up to the toy spill
but the spill was no more.
So I then called the green gecko with whom I was known
and asked if there was a shorter way for me to get home
and get there, alas! before the children I said with a cry
santageckoto unload this Humvee and find a place to hide
all the presents that I bought while on my wild drive.
“No worry mate” was all that he said as he twinkled his nose;
I found myself at home with the sound of a Star Destroyer flying overhead.
And that’s the last time I fall asleep reading Christmas sale ads while lying on my bed.

This entry was posted in America, Black Friday, Christmastime, For fun, Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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